I have a quiz tomorrow. I'm way behind in my studying. Here are nagging thoughts to record for later expansion: - Today is my 22nd birthday. I've decided that I will make a tentative plan as to where I'd like to be in 6 months, 1 year, 5 years, etc. So much pondering about the future is disconcerting especially since I know that God has so much more work to do in me. I've been praying constantly for God's guidance in some more pressing issues of relationships, careers, and daily habits. However, its so easy to see God's hand moving in hindsight and not so much in the present. - I've been attending a new (to me) church in Kansas City for two weeks now. The pastor today mentioned that they were going to start a campaign for expansion of the building to include a youth lodge and fellowship center. In my opinion, the place is already pretty sizeable. My first Sunday there, no one even noticed a new face in the crowd, for instance. I wonder if they have the community I'm seeking. Does CMDA? I'm thinking that only small group exploration will give me a good indication, but its something to think about. But really, I was just wondering why they were wanting to expand an already adequately sized building. Couldn't they be spending that time (and money) not worrying about themselves, but worrying about the community? I don't think I'll ever understand. It makes me wonder how we gauge the growth of a church- through the size of the infrastructure? through the dollar amount in the budget? through the hearts of the congregation? through the salvation of sinners? - Should we focus more on God's love that He has so freely given or God's glory that only He deserves? It seems when we focus so much on God's love for us, we make our own feelings of euphoria more important than glorifying Him. Where's the balance? Did Jesus come that we may be saved for our own benefit or did He come with the sole purpose of glorifying the Father and our salvation was a good outlet? Full of questions and no time to think them through. I'll be glad when this 'quiz' is over. | 
